No Fate With Girls??

Well,I think I have to admit it!! I will be single forever,I think!!! I don't know why those girl I approach will eventually avoid me~~~~I really feeeel so down n depress with exams comin up,still thinking this matter!!! I'm so down!!! I really dun understand why the gals will avoid me?? I neva do smtg wrong,maybe I too hurry??? Well,who knows?? Some people say dun let chances go by,I take this advise but yet it'll fail........I really dun understand them...maybe I gonna stuck in single life forever.....I can't find any girls to begin with.......all also avoid me.......All the girls I liked/loved eventually ends up like that!!! Better I stay single and be myself....seeing one by one my frens all happily couple,but I still end up single,quite jealous but what to do,no gals will like me........every1 also avoid me....aih.....starting to think I no choice but to remain single Until I old....anyway....just another whining story~~~ My life is like that....tooo bad!!! But what to do,blame myself!!!

Confession of a Broken Heart!!!!!

Just few more days before I resign at TGV,kinda miss it actually~~ And I already made up my mind and decided to confess to her on next Monday~~~Whether the result is bad or good,I'll keep on moving~~~Anyway,I already predicted the outcome,mostly kena rejected but I still wanna tell her!!! Cuz after I confess,my heart will be better,at least I knew the answer!! Haha

Well,how to say ler....actually this is the first time face to face I confess to a gal,dunno how to say actually~~~~Any ideas??Now still thinking!!! Cuz whenever I see her,I suddenly can't say anything,maybe I don't have guts.....Anyway,Monday will be the day,the day that I knew the answer and the outcome~~~~ Hahaha,embrace myself cuz Monday is my day!!!! I will tell her that "I love her"!!! Yes,I must do it!!!

P/S : Before monday,I gonna face Friday,which is my exam result coming out(most probably),this is another things I sked off,my lecturer say it's gonna send to my home!!! Well, Really dunno how to open the letter when I see it,maybe I'll ask her open when I see her,haha!!Anyway,jana...

Stress Stress Stress!!!!!

Another post again hahaha!!! Just for me to read only,actually this blog is like a diary to me,cause no one will see it,hehe!!! I admit that sometimes I like loneliness,no one can disturb you but this feeling kinda dull because deep within my heart,I feel so lonely~~~

Anyway,next week my result will be coming out~~~Well,what my feeling now?? Nervous??? Stress?? Scared??? Hahaha,what I can is "ALL I HAVE IS MIX FEELING" ,every feeling also got~~Not just the result also,thinking that I'll be leaving TGV in 31st of August make me feel sad some more because I can't c her anymore~~~ Why does the fate want me to meet her??? Why??? Why I fall her??? I really can't answer this question~~~It's all fate~~~ Result gonna coming out soon but yet I still "fan" this kind of things~~~ Love and result really drive me mad this month!!!!! GOD!!!! What Can I do now??? I really hope that I can get through but well the fate will decide it~~~ Who knows?? Gods knows and the examiner knows~~haha!!!

When thinking I gonna leave TGV,I really miss her a lot~~~ what to do~~Life goes on and on~~ I can't ruin my life because of her,I knew that she doesn't in love with me,the situation already showing it to me but I keep deny it~~haha,DENIAL IS THE BIGGEST WEAKNESS OF HUMAN!!!! What to do?? All I can do is try to build the relationship with me n her,and when I back that time,hopefully she will think highly of me than anyone else~~~ I plan to ask her out on September for a movie but I think the chances she will out with me 0% ,maybe I should ask 1st,if she don't want also nothing what,What a big deal??? No loss also,just a bit disappointed ........Wait,got my feeling is lost~~haha!!!

Until here then~~~Jana

Love

Well well, I'm back again to write my feeling nows,feeling sleepy but can't sleep because of thinking too much~~~~ How to say,I think my feeling towards that TGV girl becoming deep and deep already but yet I must control myself because I don't know what she thinks actually~~~Aih,really hope got people listening to my feelings right now~~~~ Just now,me and her just watched a movie(of cos not just we 2 la,still got other frens) ,how to say I noticed that she wearing the necklace I buy for her during my trip to Penang......

Well,is this a good start??? Or maybe she had feeling towards to me after all?? I can't confirm that cause I dunno what she thinking actually~~~Maybe,she wear it for fun only??? Or maybe I thinking too much?? So many question appearing on my minds and the saddest is I dunno the answer of all question~~~~ Feel like I'm so stupid~~~What is love??? God please tell me ler!!!! Don't play me anymore,I need an answers!!!!

I only work 2 more weeks at TGV and can only see her for few times only,there is a bit sad feeling whenever I thinks that I can't see her again,my feelings towards her grow everyday,maybe this is what we called love??? Aih.....damn confuse right now~~~Should I confess to her though I knew the answer is rather sad..............or maybe vice versa??? Hahaha...but I'm going to study at KL or work at Singapore...how??? LDR really is a tough relationship for me...maybe I think too much~~~ Well,maybe I see her happy,then can liao~~~
Or after I stop working I confess to her?? Just tell her my feeling towards her and didn't hope for anything!!! I think this 1 is much better,at least I can get the answer better than suffering here~~~

Lastly,I really want to say " I love you,PK" but hahaha,guess no one will see it~~~Just write my feeling here only!!!

Confusion - Part 2

Well well,the second part of my story I guess!!! I think I will not confess to her yet ler...since there is a lot of things that I need to think now!!! First come first,my result~~~~Well,actually I dunno what I scared of,I'm prepared for the worst case scenario but .......my heart still bumping so heart when I hear from my classmate that result will coming out this week~~~~I dunno why,maybe this is natural for people who are waiting their result......But I wish that the result will be out end of August,at least I got some time to get prepared....this week I really can't accept it............and when I think of the worst case scenario,I already decided that I will not chase that TGV gal anymore because I will go Singapore to work......

What's for I chase her when I going to Singapore,I really don't want to suffer because of the LDR!!! Better hide my feelings and prepare for departure to Singapore if my result really GG!!! But,dunno why I can't let go the feeling,everytime when i see her,I quite nervous and dunno what to chat about~~~Hahaha~~maybe this is what we called love,and yet I think she just thinks me as a friend and nothing else cause we barely know each other.....

Good also,at least I can see her happy and enjoying her life,eventhough I can't be with her,I will bless her and wishes her last forever if she found a guy that suits her~~~~~Maybe when you all read this,you all think I'm silly and idiot because dun have the courage to confess....but I would said that I will not start a LDR because it's against my principle!!!! That's I choose to let go....or maybe building the road 1st,hahaha!!! Who knows maybe in future when I back here I met her again~~~~Well,future is future and I will only decide in the future that what action should I pursue if I met her again!!!!

Confusion - Part 1

It's been a while since I posted here,but never mind though,since no one gonna read it,just wanna write down my feeling here~~~~

Well,I'm wondering how long I'm single already,I think it's more than a year already~
Haha,times really passes that fast~~~Now I started to think whether I want to find my another half or not.....Well,there is one but I'm not sure though whether I should take action or not~~

Here is my story ( no one will see it though,just write for myself as a diary), recently I worked in TGV and get to know a gal which I think I got some special feelings towards her....well,to make it simple,maybe I fall in love with her but not that deep yet(still can rescued),haha!!! Anyway,you can refer her as PK......well,from what I heard from my friend,she still considers me as friend only(maybe I knew her only 2 weeks??) Who knows??? Only god Knows~~~

So I haven't made up my mind whether I should go for her or vice versa....Maybe I only go for her after I know her better 1st or maybe I stopped working at TGV that time,I will made my confession~~~Until now,I also haven't decide it....so let the times decide it for me again~~~

I will continue the story if there is any update and new development~~~haha....guess it is part 1........if you all (which I think no one will see it) can wait,then wait for part 2~~~

F*** words

Well,hello everyone who viewing my blog now....I want to say that this is my first blog ever in my life...I mean serious 1 la not joking and full of crap that kind of blog...Well,how to say it~~
At first,I never thinking to start blogging but 1 of my friend keep persuading me to start so I guess I gonna tried it....For those who doesn't know,I go into a brief introduction. You all can call me Michael or Ah Fei if you like....But i prefer Michael because most of my classmate calling me Michael( Only some of my good friends know me since secondary school call me Ah Fei ). I'm currently a student who taking L.L.B hons. which I think is a tough subjects but still gonna take it...Quite stupid huh me?? Haha....

Ok back to the title I want to write.Why I wanna write about this words?? Haha,really ridiculous if you ask. It is because I came across in my study today.Sounds unbelievable right?? Me also frightened because this is the first time I came across this word in my education. Note that,this word appears in text book!!!! After that,I began curious about this words and find some information regarding the words Fuck in the internet......Surprisingly,I found out that the words "FUCK" got a long long long ago history.I guess most of us dunno where this word come from and how is it coming from!!! I did some searches regarding this and I found out that the origins of the words is quite uncertain. But now I do know that the words "FUCK" exist long time ago which is around 500 years ago..The origins of this word come from the Anglo-Saxon times. Although some sources say that this words come from a person named John le Fucker who appeared in AD 1278 but it was quite doubtful because an email discussion on linguist says :
This name has been exhaustively argued over ... The "John le Fucker" reference first appears in Carl Buck's 1949 Indo-European dictionary. Buck does not supply a citation as to where he found the name. No one has subsequently found the manuscript in which it is alleged to have appeared. If the citation is genuine and not an error, it is most likely a spelling variant of "fulcher", meaning soldier.
(Copy from www.wikipedia.org) Credits to the person who found this.

There are some of the sources also but it quite rather long,so I post a link to it so you all can refer.The first usage of this word can be found at 1475 poems which named " Flens flyys" . Also,this words haven't appear in English language dictionary from 1795 to 1965. Its first appearance was in Oxford English Dictionary 1972.Well,I think I write more enough already,so its time to end the first blog...quite sleepy actually,guess I gonna have some rest first. Bye

Info taken on : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuck

Want to know more about this words,try go the above website and read it all...